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Think your rent is expensive? Try RSVP’ing to a wedding these days.

While the cost of proposals and weddings is astronomically high these days, being a guest who not only watches a happy couple say their “I do’s” but who also attends pre-wedding festivities can set people back around $2,010, which is just a few dollars more than the average cost of rent in the US, according to a Zillow analysis.

And if you’re a bridesmaid? Forget about it.

Between the dress, shoes, hair, makeup, gifts and mandatory pre-wedding blowouts, a local wedding can easily cost anywhere from $1,500 to $2,500, according to Brides. (Translation: “27 Dresses” now belongs in the fantasy-rom-com hall of fame).

If you received an invite to a destination wedding — brace yourself. The outlet reports guests (and yes, the wedding party) can pay upwards of $3,000 and $5,000 to attend one.

Weddings aren’t just expensive — they’re debt machines. A 2024 Lending Tree survey found that of the 54% of Americans who were wedding party members within the past five years, nearly a third of them racked up debt because of it, with 23% being at a loss of $2,500 or more.

Pre-wedding festivities, like bachelor parties and bridal showers, were the main culprits, according to 74% of those financial casualties.

With all that being said, many potential bridesmaids are now saying “I don’t” to being in wedding parties due to the exorbitant costs involved.

In a recent video, TikTokker @wed_west proudly said, “Sue me. I don’t want to spend $5k to be your bridesmaid.” She added, “I’m not even sorry.”

One commenter agreed, writing, “It should not cost you more than a few hundred dollars this is all out of control.”

Another quipped, “do you get a refund when they get divorced?”

Some are even writing bridesmaid “resignation letters,” like Ruhama Wolle, who gained traction for her 2023 essay“To All My Friends, This Is My Bridesmaid Resignation Letter.”

The topic is such a talked-about one that Wolle even took things a step further by writing “I Hope You Elope: A Bridesmaid Survival Guide,” a book that was written — and is being published next year — for people to “protect their sanity and their wallets.”

Sounds like something every wedding party member needs to read.