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As Labour heads for annihilation in tomorrow's elections, Sir Keir Starmer's position looks shakier than ever. He seems to be the only man in the country who thinks he's doing a good job. The British public certainly don't. Labour MPs think he's toxic, and should be kept away from the publical together. Party activists have had enough too. They're drifting away en masse to Zack Polanski's unhinged Green Party. The only thing saving Starmer, for now, is that Labour still can't agree on who replaces him.

But there is a clear frontrunner. Angela Rayner is currently leading the pack, with Andy Burnham and Wes Streeting trailing, and Ed Miliband further back. Yet Red Ange still faces resistance. She's Marmite even within her own party, and some MPs have will do whatever it takes to block her path to power. Rayner divides the public too. Some admire her for being gritty, grounded and human. Others see those traits as liabilities. Too rough, too unrefined, not PM material at all. And Rayner knows it.

Nobody looks at their best on an inflatable, except kids. Pictures of Angela Rayner floating on a blow-up canoe off Brighton beach didn't do her any favours. In a vest top, tattoo on show, sucking on a vape and glugging a glass of lady petrol. It didn't exactly scream future PM.

Her defenders cried sexism. Others, snobbery. After all, there are plenty of images of Winston Churchill with a cigar and brandy. But Churchill kept his shirt on. And shunned lilos. Crucially, he looked like he was in charge.

It looks like the pressure is getting to her, following reports that she was "obliterated" in a Parliament bar last week. It ended in a violent confrontation with an innocent door. That might play well with some voters. But it will disturb many more.

With the top job in her sights, Rayner is desperate to look like a credible occupant of No 10 Downing Street. Now she's decided to get serious about power. By quitting vaping.

She says her kids pushed her into it. They're sick of her puffing away, and have dubbed her the "vape dragon." Good luck to her. Quitting smoking isn't easy. But while she says she's doing it for the kids, she surely doing it for the rest of us too.

Rayner knows it's time to clean her act up. The vaping, the drinking, the floating, the fighting, everything. She's sending out a message to the entire country. I'm serious now. I'm in control. So watch out world. Keir Starmer should be shaking. Rayner might do to him what she did to that poor door.

But she has a lot of convincing to do first. She needs to convince us she made an honest error by skipping the £40,000 stamp duty bill on her luxury pad in Hove. That it's not one law for her, one for everyone else.

She needs to persuade the nation that she can cut a serious and sober figure, and make us forget that inflatable canoe. We'll need reassuring that her Marxist lover Sam Tarry will keep his feet off No 10's seats. And that she'll avoid any more bruising encounters with doors. Drinking less would help.

Rayner has a lot of work to do. She might convince the Labour Party, but she'll have a much harder job convincing the rest of us. Quitting vaping is the easy bit.