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There was never any quarrel with a lover or a lover. You will travel abroad together, buy a huge apartment, have your own car in the garage – how many plans have you made. But these days there is conflict between words. Complaints against each other are piling up in both minds. There is no other way but separation?

It is normal for the ‘honeymoon period’ at the beginning of a love relationship to fade. But relationship experts say, this sweet-sweet time can be extended if desired. A special method should be used for that. This mantra is called ‘Ikigai’ – an important part of Japanese philosophy. A few years ago, the book ‘Ikigai: The Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life’ written by Hector Garcia and Francisco Mirales became a bestseller.

As the name of the book suggests, the ‘Ikigai’ method is what it really is. Finding a way to live a carefree life is the motto of this policy. Relationship experts say that it can be used in love too. It is said to put aside all big plans for the future and focus on solving small problems.

• Find relationship purpose – Why did you think of staying together? List the good things that have happened in both of your lives because of the relationship.
• Question each other’s values – Respect, honesty, freedom, priority of family, work life – do the opinions of both of them match? Does not match in any case? In those cases, is it possible for one to accept the other’s values?
• Work hand in hand together – Is there any work that both of you will be happy together? Be it cleaning the house, going for an afternoon walk, or cooking. Share small tasks. Help each other.
• Relationships are not just emotions – Emotions are a very important part of any relationship. Emotion is what attracts one person to another, gives birth to hope. But a relationship cannot be sustained on emotions alone. So forcefully discuss everything that is difficult in life, be it responsibility or duty, both of you.
  

  

• Check each other regularly – Every day we meet and talk, but we forget to ask simple questions like ‘How are you?’ Take time to ask the person on the opposite side how he is doing. Give time to the relationship.

If you can’t keep peace in personal life, you can’t keep it at large. So whenever you have any kind of problem, ask yourself first.