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Dr Hetal Gosalia addresses common sexual health concerns, reassuring that sex after hysterectomy can return to normal or even improve with time and proper care. Irritability and reduced libido in men may be linked to stress, health issues or emotional factors. Sexual fantasies are normal but should not replace real-life intimacy.

I am 52 years old and doctors have advised the removal of my uterus because of fibroid issues. Will this affect my sex life? SR, Govandi

Sex after hysterectomy can be as enjoyable as before. It does get affected due to surgery in the postrecovery period, which is about six to eight months. It also depends on whether the ovaries are intact or removed as hormones like oestrogen and progesterone are affected. However, gradually one may start with a normal sex life and rather it may improve too, as the problems due to fibroids get resolved. Hot flushes, vaginal dryness, loss of libido or problems with intercourse are some common issues which you can face.

It can be dealt with increased foreplay and water-based lubricants. You can add sex toys too in the foreplay. You may take time initially for arousal, but gradually you will be able to enjoy the same way as before. Feel free to discuss with your gynaecologist who may guide you for hormone replacement therapy if needed or visit a sexologist.

I am a 44-year-old man. Of late, I have become very irritable. Is it a coincidence that my sex life is on the wane? JB, Nallasopara

‘Happy hormones’ are secreted during healthy sex, thus flooding each and every cell of your body with happiness. A waning sex life can cause irritability. But there can also be other reasons for irritability and decreased libido. Figure out what is bothering you emotionally as well as physically. What makes your mood low? Why is your sex desire less? At 44, erection may be affected due to stress, depression, a relationship discord, organic illness like blood pressure or diabetes. Wisely consult a sexologist, who will listen to you in detail and evaluate the reasons. Do not lose heart, as there are treatments and you can revive your sex life.

I am a 35-year-old married man. I fantasise a lot about sex. Is this normal? KU, Kharghar

Oh yes, fantasy is absolutely normal in sex. Feel free and enjoy your fantasy without guilt, which will enrich your pleasures. You may or may not share with your partner. It is okay to keep it personal. But do remember that reality is not the same as fantasy. Do not try / attempt to bring it into real life. The only problem is when you start expecting in real life with your partner and then you don’t feel excited anymore; this may affect your sex life and relationship.

Dr Hetal Gosalia, Samadhan Health Studio. Queries may be sent to fpj.sexmatters@gmail.com