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Can it really be true that King Charles wants to offer Harry and Meghan Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor's old home, Royal Lodge, as an olive branch to heal their six-year rift? So, Harry abandons his royal duties and strops out of Britain, claiming his family and the British people are racist.

Over the next three years, he trashes his family and the monarchy on the global stage for huge sums of money and then writes a trashy tell-all book that insults and destroys relationships with almost every member of his family. And for doing all that, he gets rewarded with the offer of a palace? "Charles wants unity," said a source. Sorry, but unity shouldn't have to be bought, which is exactly what Charles would be doing.

Yes, Love Island star Maura Higgins is beautiful, but you really can have too much of a good thing.

Her pictures are everywhere, every day. I've no clue if she's ever had a proper job - apart from reality TV shows. But sadly, she's become the poster girl for young women who want fame and wealth for having done and achieved nothing!

A bunch of boffins - obviously blokes - from Bath University are saying that hairdressers should now lecture their clients about global warming when they're having a cut and blow dry.

No, they shouldn't. Salons all over the country would be empty if they did. Women don't go to the hairdressers to be nagged about climate change. We go to be pampered, to read magazines and to talk about inane stuff like our holidays.

Posh and Becks posted a birthday message for son Brooklyn despite his lawyers' request that they stop communicating with him. The post showed a giggling baby Brooklyn with mum and dad in a swimming pool.

What do Posh and Becks hope to achieve by this? Certainly not a reconciliation with their son, who's so determined to sever ties with them that he resorted to the law to do it. Yet still they post an intimate family photo knowing it will be picked up by the media, and the family feud will yet again be worldwide news.

This post feels like it has nothing to do with Brooklyn or his birthday. It's just his mum and dad desperately trying to manipulate the situation and doing exactly what Brooklyn accused them of - relentlessly making their private lives horribly public. The lad probably feels like he's being stalked.

Shabana Mahmood is one of the most impressive ministers in this Government of fools, but her announcement this week to give up to £40,000 to failed asylum families is beyond stupid. It's a blatant incentive for people to come here.

Families from poverty-stricken countries all over the world will be packing as we speak to get here and claim asylum (even if they don't want to stay), knowing they'll be given £10,000 a head to go home. Mahmood says it's cheaper than keeping them here.

Maybe. But it's a cop-out. How about an immigration policy that stops anyone who comes here illegally setting foot on British soil? That way we can deport them without paying a penny!

In Rachel Reeves' spring statement this week, it was revealed that thanks to her disastrous policies, more than ONE MILLION pensioners will now be dragged into paying tax.

The only statement anyone ever wants to hear from Wrecker Reeves is: "I resign."

Newly elected Green MP Hannah Spencer reckons the sky-high taxes we pay go to "lining the pockets of billionaires". No, they don't. They go to support the millions of Brits (and others) who don't bother to work and the tens of thousands of illegal immigrants flooding our shores every day - immigrants Ms Spencer's lunatic party wants to throw open our doors to and not only give them all a house but a wage as well - even if they don't work.