What European parents do differently: Indian woman shares 5 parenting habits she wants to steal from them
ETimes | July 16, 2026 4:40 PM CST
Parents everywhere want the same thing: to raise happy, confident children. But the way they go about it can look very different from one country to another. An Indian woman recently spent a month travelling through Europe, and came back with a slightly different lens on parenting. In an Instagram post, Dr Sukhmani Gumber listed five things she noticed European parents doing differently, habits that, in her words, she's "definitely stealing."
She was quick to add that this isn't about ranking cultures or saying one way is "better." It's more about small shifts in mindset that can help kids grow into more adaptable, independent, and confident people.
Here's what she noticed.
Your child doesn’t have to be the center of your world
The first thing she picked up on was that parents weren't constantly rearranging their day around their children's entertainment. “Not every activity has to revolve around your child. You have a life too,” she wrote. There was no constant hunt for "kid-friendly" cafes or activities. The kids simply came along for whatever the parents were doing. Coffee runs, dinners, train journeys, grocery shopping- children were folded into normal adult life rather than the other way round.
The advantage, she says, is that kids learn to adjust to different settings. “The more they’re included, the more they’ll learn to adapt,” she said. They pick up early on that the world isn't built around them, and that's fine. And parents get to breathe a little too, enjoying their own lives without guilt is good for everyone.
Boredom isn’t that bad
There's a lot of pressure on parents today to fill every waking minute of a child's day. Dr Gumber noticed European parents were far more relaxed about letting kids just wait. Sit. Do nothing for a bit. “Not every minute needs a toy, a screen, or an activity. Waiting 5-10 minutes won’t harm your child,” she wrote.
“If anything, it might do them good by sparking creativity, teaching patience, and pushing kids to entertain themselves instead of relying on someone else to do it for them.
Table manners can start younger than we think
Yes, kids spill things. But that doesn't mean they can't start learning how to behave at a table early on. Dr Gumber saw children at restaurants sitting through meals with their families, slowly picking up how to behave in public.
Nobody expected flawless behaviour. What stood out was that parents treated kids as capable of learning, rather than writing them off as "too small to understand."
Kids can eat what the rest of the family eats
Food is where Dr Gumber noticed one of the bigger differences. Rather than cooking a separate meal for the child every time, or treating pizza, ice cream and cookies as forbidden territory, most parents just aimed for balance.
“Once in a while, sharing that ice cream, pizza, or chocolate chip cookie isn’t going to make your child unhealthy, just like it won’t make you unhealthy,” she wrote. She says, “Sometimes we spend the first few years making these foods seem completely forbidden, only for them to become the most exciting thing ever later.”
A relaxed, balanced approach to food, she felt, works better in the long run than one built on strict no's and yes's. “And if you want your child to eat better, it often starts with what’s on your own plate,” she wrote.
Don't panic over public tantrums
This one, she said, stuck with her the most. “I saw children cry in cafes and restaurants and parents stayed calm.” No embarrassment, no rushing to shush the child, no anxious glances at other tables. “Tantrums are part of childhood, not a reflection of your parenting. They let the emotions pass first, then calmly talk to their child afterward,” she shared.
A tantrum just means a child is still learning how to handle big feelings and staying calm yourself is often the best way to help them get there.
What can modern parents take away from this
There's no single "correct" way to raise a child, and what works in one home may not work in another. But Dr Gumber's observations are a nice reminder that kids don't always need to be entertained, perfectly behaved, or shielded from every uncomfortable moment. Sometimes, just letting them tag along, wait a little, watch, and live everyday life alongside the adults around them builds more resilience than any planned activity could.
As she put it, parenting isn't always about doing more. Sometimes it's about doing a little less and trusting kids to figure the rest out.
She was quick to add that this isn't about ranking cultures or saying one way is "better." It's more about small shifts in mindset that can help kids grow into more adaptable, independent, and confident people.
Here's what she noticed.
Your child doesn’t have to be the center of your world
The first thing she picked up on was that parents weren't constantly rearranging their day around their children's entertainment. “Not every activity has to revolve around your child. You have a life too,” she wrote. There was no constant hunt for "kid-friendly" cafes or activities. The kids simply came along for whatever the parents were doing. Coffee runs, dinners, train journeys, grocery shopping- children were folded into normal adult life rather than the other way round.
The advantage, she says, is that kids learn to adjust to different settings. “The more they’re included, the more they’ll learn to adapt,” she said. They pick up early on that the world isn't built around them, and that's fine. And parents get to breathe a little too, enjoying their own lives without guilt is good for everyone.
Boredom isn’t that bad
There's a lot of pressure on parents today to fill every waking minute of a child's day. Dr Gumber noticed European parents were far more relaxed about letting kids just wait. Sit. Do nothing for a bit. “Not every minute needs a toy, a screen, or an activity. Waiting 5-10 minutes won’t harm your child,” she wrote.
“If anything, it might do them good by sparking creativity, teaching patience, and pushing kids to entertain themselves instead of relying on someone else to do it for them.
Table manners can start younger than we think
Yes, kids spill things. But that doesn't mean they can't start learning how to behave at a table early on. Dr Gumber saw children at restaurants sitting through meals with their families, slowly picking up how to behave in public.
Nobody expected flawless behaviour. What stood out was that parents treated kids as capable of learning, rather than writing them off as "too small to understand."
Kids can eat what the rest of the family eats
Food is where Dr Gumber noticed one of the bigger differences. Rather than cooking a separate meal for the child every time, or treating pizza, ice cream and cookies as forbidden territory, most parents just aimed for balance.
“Once in a while, sharing that ice cream, pizza, or chocolate chip cookie isn’t going to make your child unhealthy, just like it won’t make you unhealthy,” she wrote. She says, “Sometimes we spend the first few years making these foods seem completely forbidden, only for them to become the most exciting thing ever later.”
A relaxed, balanced approach to food, she felt, works better in the long run than one built on strict no's and yes's. “And if you want your child to eat better, it often starts with what’s on your own plate,” she wrote.
Don't panic over public tantrums
This one, she said, stuck with her the most. “I saw children cry in cafes and restaurants and parents stayed calm.” No embarrassment, no rushing to shush the child, no anxious glances at other tables. “Tantrums are part of childhood, not a reflection of your parenting. They let the emotions pass first, then calmly talk to their child afterward,” she shared.
A tantrum just means a child is still learning how to handle big feelings and staying calm yourself is often the best way to help them get there.
What can modern parents take away from this
There's no single "correct" way to raise a child, and what works in one home may not work in another. But Dr Gumber's observations are a nice reminder that kids don't always need to be entertained, perfectly behaved, or shielded from every uncomfortable moment. Sometimes, just letting them tag along, wait a little, watch, and live everyday life alongside the adults around them builds more resilience than any planned activity could.
As she put it, parenting isn't always about doing more. Sometimes it's about doing a little less and trusting kids to figure the rest out.
READ NEXT
-
Argentina player ratings vs England: Messi inspires comeback as Fernandez and Lautaro fire champions into another World Cup final
-
England vs France gives Manu Kone the ideal opportunity to secure his £47m transfer to Manchester United
-
Liverpool and Arsenal challenge Manchester United’s move for Manu Kone
-
Severe Flash Flooding in Kerr County, Texas Claims Life and Triggers Emergency Rescues
-
Why Prince Harry can't make peace with King Charles without Queen Camilla
